Sunday, November 8, 2009

Today I am a Wolverine!

I just finished playing the X-Men Origins: Wolverine: Uncaged Edition video game, which is probably one of the most faithful movie based video games. People were probably angry about how much the movie deviated from the comic books, but I doubt they’d be able to argue that the game, which uses actual dialogue and scenes from the movie, is a painful detraction. In fact, it’s better. The game makes the final climactic scene with Wolverine fighting Deadpool on top of a nuclear cooling tower cool. The game is soaked with blood, which the movie lacked. While in the movie you have to watch Deadpool pull his squeaky-clean swords out of freshly killed corpse, in the game, Wolverine delights in impaling people on tree branches.
Despite this, the game has some points that, if you over-think them, make no logistical sense. Such as: Wolverine’s claws are adamantium, and can cut through everything, but after he leans on a downed enemy combatant’s chest, and repeatedly stabs him in the face, the dude can still get up. The dude just got stabbed in the brain eighteen times and he can still get up.
I pity the goons in the game. These are guys who proclaim, “Give up, there’s no chance of escape,” as they stand against the edge of a bottomless pit you can hurl them down with the smallest shove. Wolverine has the clear advantage: he has an indestructible skeleton and he can heal from any wound, plus he has claws that can cut through steel. That = Win.
For instance, he can survive falling like a bullet from fifty miles up with enough force to create a crater, but for some reason, if he fall two storeys into some bushes, it’s game over. There’s an actual scene where Wolverine climbs to the top of a giant tower, then blows it up. He’s hurtled about half-a-mile, and gets up afterwards. BUT: if you slip off of the tower while climbing it, you’re dead.
Also: his costume grows back. No explanation: but it grows back.

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