Jake and the Neverland Pirates is a question wrapped inside of an enigma. The first thought that bursts into someone’s mind when they learn someone made a Disney kid’s show about a group of three pirate kids in Neverland and their adventures involving Captain Hook is, “Where’s Peter Pan?” Seriously, where the fuck is Peter Pan? There’s DVD that supposedly explains everything, and I’m about ready to drop $30 on it. Why are the kids hanging around Captain Hook, when they could be rolling with the Lost Boys? They’re also not a part of Captain Hook’s crew. They’re basically a rival gang of pirates, operating out a secret pirate lair. In the show, they find clues from Peter Pan about treasure on the island, and they have a bag of Tinkerbelle’s magical pixie dust, but neither character is to be seen. Its almost as if they didn’t have the rights to the characters, which is impossible considering its Disney, and they have Captain Hook.
Seriously, though, where is Peter Pan? Is the series set in the interim period shown in the movie Hook? Did Peter Pan fly away and forget how to get back? That’s one of the rules: Peter Pan can’t stay away from Neverland for too long or he’ll forget how to ever make it back home. Then how does he leave clues for the pirate kids?
GRAH!
I was also thinking about how great a villain Captain Hook is. He’s not a one-track character like in every other kid’s story. Captain Hook has a full itinerary that goes well and beyond killing Peter Pan. For instance, a day for him could involve:
1: Revenge against the crocodile that bit off his hand, ala Moby Dick.
2: Stealing magic from the island .
3: Stealing treasure from the island.
4: Finding a way home from Neverland.
5: Being a pirate.
6: For some reason: baseball.
Think of other villains, like Voldemort. What’s his plan?
Step One: Kill Harry Potter.
Step Two: ???
Step Three: Profit!
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