Saturday, September 24, 2011

The Impossible Achievement

While playing Halo: Reach last night, I unlocked:

image

Which should impossible, because in order to get this achievement, I would have had to purchase and download the Noble map pack for 800MS point. I got angry afterwards and had to go through my download history, thinking either myself or my step-son had accidentally purchased it, but that wasn’t the case.

My theory is: I was so awesome that it broke the game. Usually, when playing these types of games, I always choose the jetpack loadout while the song “Fett’s Vette” plays in the background.

That wasn’t working for me this time. Every time I tried to use the jetpack to bounce over a vehicle barrelling down on me, they’d hit a hill and jump to collide with me mid-air, while the Dukes of Hazard theme plays.

So I picked up the armor lock on the next life. Next time some fucker tried to mow me down, I hit the armor lock and they ran into me like a brick wall. Chunks of futuristic machinery and shrapnel flew around me Michael Bay style as I crouched down, posed. Then I got 25 Achievement points. I then went on to die about twenty more times, and lose the game by a wide margin, but who cares after something like that.

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