You Old Bastard

Ever have this happen to you at McDonald's? You’re standing in line for five minutes or more, and just as you reach the counter, some old bastard cuts in front of you to ask for a free coffee refill. There you are: a paying customer being circumvented by this decrepit shell of a human being asking for something for free, as if their need is greater. These are the geezers who spend all day at fast food joints, making a mockery of the term, “fast.” You’re likely to spend more on your single purchase than they will for their entire week stay at McDonald’s. They may still be on their first cup of coffee eight days later. Who knows? They’re like the kids at an arcade who can make a single quarter last them eight hours on a cabinet.
At no point, however, should these people be given priority over a customer in line. If they want coffee, they can get in line just like everyone else. Why are they rushing ahead of the line anyway? They have nothing to do all day. Their lives are done. That’s why they’re hanging out in McDonalds like reverse teenagers.
No one ever says a thing, however, we simply wait patiently for however long it takes them to place their ridiculous order. “Half-coffee and half-hot water, with cream and sugar,” the old lady said. WHAT? You want a half a cup of coffee and half a cup of hot water mixed together? Do you know what coffee is? HOT WATER. Putting water in coffee makes more coffee, albeit in a diluted state. Is that what you want? Watered down coffee? Why not try decaf? Also: notice how the word “please” was nowhere in that sentence.
The cashiers always serve these freaks with a smile on their face, as the only other alternative is a complete mental breakdown. Meanwhile, I’ll be on a fifteen minute break, and the clock is ticking.
I don’t know what age courtesy dies at. One would assume it’s at age 15, but then it grows back in time to enter the workforce and have your soul crushed. Then, after forty years of that, the facade breaks down and you turn into the sort of person who cuts in line without an explanation or cause.
As for courtesy: I think I’m being very courteous by saying nothing, but what about you? Have you ever seen some freak out? Have you freaked out?

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