Captain Shamerica

After leaving the theatre, I realized that at no point during the preceding movie had Captain America fought a Nazi. He had fought numerous agents of Hydra, which was a breakaway terrorist organization that collaborated with the Nazis, but not necessarily Nazis themselves. The closest he came to fighting a real Nazi was fake-punching the stage actor pretending to be Hitler during the V.S.O, shows. Furthermore, he hadn’t physically participated in WWII. He fought in splinter campaigns that targeted Hydra weapons manufacturing plants, which had nothing to do with the war against Germany. By killing the three Nazi officials who came to inspect his work, the Red Skull did more for the Allied war effort that Captain America.

Which led me to think more about what I know regarding Captain America. In the original comic books, Captain America kept his true identity as Steve Rogers a secret, which makes no sense. He was enlisted in the army and would have to sneak out of his barracks at night in disguise to fight Nazis as Captain America. Why? Did the U.S. not want a costumed super hero running around Europe solving all their problems for them while advertising how awesome America is? In the movie, they turn Steve Rogers into the ultimate soldier, and then turn him into a prop for selling War Bonds. That, at least, I can believe. Think of all the professional athletes who get pumped up full of steroids to become super beings just so they can sell us shoes made by Chinese children. Think of all they could accomplish with their athleticism, and all they ever turn into is a corporate shill. We always assumed Air Jordan could one day save us from Martian invasion, but he’d rather sell us Air Jordans.

I was impressed by how the movie successfully tied in with Thor and Iron Man, especially since it’s set seventy years before either of those movies took place, and at no point is Captain America ever mentioned in those titles. That’s like getting Buffy the Vampire Slayer to tie into Toy Story, with only the weakest thread tying them together.